I can barely see the computer screen through my tears as I type, so forgive me. I'm having official big-time, world-class mommy meltdown...It all started with me changing Cade into his 3rd outfit of the day (spit-up #1, poop leakage #2) and thinking "I'm going to miss this" as he grins at me from the changing table. I gotta give it to him, the kid is very grateful when you change his diaper and give him a good wipedown. It makes the impending load of laundry seem worth it.
Anyways, I know it's a waste of my last week of maternity leave summer to sit around and cry. I just don't know how to proceed. Go out and about with Cade and have some fun? Or hold him in a rocking chair and play at home?
I know I'm still a little teeny tiny bit excited for another school year (I've been excited about school since I was 4 and watched the big kids march off to kindergarten)...I've just got to mourn the 8 hours a day someone else gets to see that smile and hold those little hands and stroke his downy hair. I have a feeling come August 24th you'll find me crying into my bean bag chair with a brand new kindergartener. Both of us so scared, anxious, and a little bit excited about the road ahead of us.
Oh honey, it broke my heart to read this, but you'll all adjust and you'll still get plenty of time with dear little Cade. Call me if you need a "shoulder" to cry on.
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