It sucks to wake up at home the first day after you've gotten back from a vacation. Today however, I was so glad to be at home and have all my usual baby equipment around me. Crib, changing table, Boppy pillow, swing, bouncer, play gym, ahhh! The feeling didn't last long.
I realized we had double dr appoinments today. First stop, pediatrician for part 2 of 2 month old vaccinations. I don't truly buy into the philosophy that vaccinations cause Autism, but I chose to break them up because I do believe that my newborn doesn't need 6 vaccinations at once. Cade is hilarious, by the way, when he gets a shot. He has Binks in his mouth every time to soothe himself. He is cool when he is getting the shot, then 2 second later his face turns red and he scrunches into frown-mode, and starts with a little cry. When I tell him he's got a cool band-aid he immediately stops. This strategy has only been tested once, but it's 2 for 2:) Hims proud of his Tweety Bird daisy band-aid!
Dr. Appt #2 was at Cranial Technologies for his DOC band fitting. I was pretty pumped to see the cool digital imaging stocking they'd put on his head to capture measurements and make the cast of his head. I got Cade down to his diaper, played with him while we waited for the clinicians to come get us, then my bubble was officially burst. The kind lady showed me the stocking, which looks like a white pair of women's hose, and she explained that it literally would go over his whole head and face. WTF?! Over his face?! She said he could have his binky in his mouth while he was in the stocking, thank God! But that did not prepare me for seeing my child mummified. They took him away from me and put him on a stool (propping him up of course) and sang to him and talked to him while a huge horseshoe apparatus of digital cameras snapped away various angles of his head.
It was all over soon and Cade did awesome, totally nowhere near as disturbed, distressed, or otherwise as tramautized as I was. All he wanted was lunch! Like Mommy like son, give us food and we're happy campers.
Now we've got to wait one week for the helmet to come in custom-made from Arizona. In the meantime I'm loving seeing his new downy-soft blonde hair and- finally!- cradle cap free head.
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Monday, July 6, 2009
Mama Bitch
(Original title: Mama Bear, but listening to "soothing" music while on hold with insurance company facilitated my edit)
You know some days you wake up, read the horoscope, and wonder to yourself "WTF is that supposed to mean?" You make some predictions in your head and you go about your day. Then, like Matt Lauer hitting the deer, BAM! It hits you and you think "Right on, Google horoscope guru!" (This hold music is taking forever...hence my long intro)
I was informed today by Cranial Technologies that my insurance, Cigna, has a fancy little EXCLUSION on it that allows them to deny coverage for Cade's $3,600 Dynamic Orthotic Cranioplasty (DOC band). I was warned by parent groups online that insurance carriers have a tendency to dub plagiocephaly/brachycephaly (yup, Cade's got a dual diagnosis) as a cosmetic procedure. I haven't heard those 2 words uttered by Cigna reps on the phone yet (again, still holding). Instead they are saying that they will only cover the DOC band and therapy AFTER my newborn has skull surgery. Um, wtf?
One would think that a $3,600 head mold and weekly therapy (included in cost at Cranial Technologies, making it stand out as the better choice among every plagio support group online) would be cheaper for the insurance company. As one parent on a support site puts it, "It seems my insurance company would allow me to break my child's skull, then they'd cover the therapy. It's criminal and illogical."
Putting aside the whole "cosmetic" argument (obviously you don't want your baby to have a deformed head, assymetrical eyes and cheek bones, ears, and ears that protrude), how can they say it's not medically necessary? I don't need to convince you, my online friends, but the clinicians and multiple sites I've researched state that untreated plagiocephaly can lead to migraines, ear infections, sinus infections, TMJ, and for sporting helmets to not fit in later childhood and adulthood. It's crystal clear to this Mama Bear!
(Finally off hold, the fine lady at Cigna acted like she's never heard of this before, when the first rep I talked to completely knew the cranial lingo...hm)
My next step is to get my pediatrician to call in a pre-authorization and send a letter of medical necessity. Turns out the nurse just told me that they already have these form letters ready to go for the various insurance agencies that turn it down. Positional plagiocephaly (caused by external forces such as crib beds putting pressure on the skull causing it to flatten in places) is on the rise 60% since the Back to Sleep campaign to put babies to sleep on their backs to avoid SIDS. The pediatricians are aware and mine was on her game when she started giving me repositioning tips to avoid flattening from month 1...If only the insurance groups would catch on. It's sick and horrible that insurance companies make you jump through hoops to get this coverage, when other parents may not take the time to fight for it and their child doesn't get the orthotic and therapy.
** You know, one parent online said that she'd rather pay the $3600 for the DOC band than buy a headstone for another child she could have lost to SIDS. ** It breaks my heart that you try your best to do right by your child and people have to stand in the way.
Here's the horoscope I referenced at the beginning of this entry.
"You might feel as if you are the only one who can clearly see what's happening today. This may encourage your stubbornness as you attempt to navigate yourself and others through a complex minefield of obstacles, some real and others imagined. But you could make a crucial error in your thinking if you start out with the assumption that everyone else is wrong. Incorporating multiple points of view into your perspective will strengthen the foundations you are now building."
As always, when faced with a tough situation I'm going to do my research, get it all organized, color-coded, whatever I need to do and be my own lawyer and fight for what's right. Watch out, world....Mama Bitch is ON!
You know some days you wake up, read the horoscope, and wonder to yourself "WTF is that supposed to mean?" You make some predictions in your head and you go about your day. Then, like Matt Lauer hitting the deer, BAM! It hits you and you think "Right on, Google horoscope guru!" (This hold music is taking forever...hence my long intro)
I was informed today by Cranial Technologies that my insurance, Cigna, has a fancy little EXCLUSION on it that allows them to deny coverage for Cade's $3,600 Dynamic Orthotic Cranioplasty (DOC band). I was warned by parent groups online that insurance carriers have a tendency to dub plagiocephaly/brachycephaly (yup, Cade's got a dual diagnosis) as a cosmetic procedure. I haven't heard those 2 words uttered by Cigna reps on the phone yet (again, still holding). Instead they are saying that they will only cover the DOC band and therapy AFTER my newborn has skull surgery. Um, wtf?
One would think that a $3,600 head mold and weekly therapy (included in cost at Cranial Technologies, making it stand out as the better choice among every plagio support group online) would be cheaper for the insurance company. As one parent on a support site puts it, "It seems my insurance company would allow me to break my child's skull, then they'd cover the therapy. It's criminal and illogical."
Putting aside the whole "cosmetic" argument (obviously you don't want your baby to have a deformed head, assymetrical eyes and cheek bones, ears, and ears that protrude), how can they say it's not medically necessary? I don't need to convince you, my online friends, but the clinicians and multiple sites I've researched state that untreated plagiocephaly can lead to migraines, ear infections, sinus infections, TMJ, and for sporting helmets to not fit in later childhood and adulthood. It's crystal clear to this Mama Bear!
(Finally off hold, the fine lady at Cigna acted like she's never heard of this before, when the first rep I talked to completely knew the cranial lingo...hm)
My next step is to get my pediatrician to call in a pre-authorization and send a letter of medical necessity. Turns out the nurse just told me that they already have these form letters ready to go for the various insurance agencies that turn it down. Positional plagiocephaly (caused by external forces such as crib beds putting pressure on the skull causing it to flatten in places) is on the rise 60% since the Back to Sleep campaign to put babies to sleep on their backs to avoid SIDS. The pediatricians are aware and mine was on her game when she started giving me repositioning tips to avoid flattening from month 1...If only the insurance groups would catch on. It's sick and horrible that insurance companies make you jump through hoops to get this coverage, when other parents may not take the time to fight for it and their child doesn't get the orthotic and therapy.
** You know, one parent online said that she'd rather pay the $3600 for the DOC band than buy a headstone for another child she could have lost to SIDS. ** It breaks my heart that you try your best to do right by your child and people have to stand in the way.
Here's the horoscope I referenced at the beginning of this entry.
"You might feel as if you are the only one who can clearly see what's happening today. This may encourage your stubbornness as you attempt to navigate yourself and others through a complex minefield of obstacles, some real and others imagined. But you could make a crucial error in your thinking if you start out with the assumption that everyone else is wrong. Incorporating multiple points of view into your perspective will strengthen the foundations you are now building."
As always, when faced with a tough situation I'm going to do my research, get it all organized, color-coded, whatever I need to do and be my own lawyer and fight for what's right. Watch out, world....Mama Bitch is ON!
Sunday, July 5, 2009
My Plagio Baby
Well, well, well.... the day no Momma wants to experience came and I managed to keep living.
Back story: About 3 weeks old, I had crazy freak out day way back, when I was feeding Cade and saw that one ear looked different than the other. I drove him up to my mom's school and had her nurse and coworkers check him out. At the time I thought maybe there was an ear infection. At his month check up I asked the dr about one side of his head that seemed a little flatter. The pediatrician recommended switching sides of the crib when I put him down at night. At his second month check-up she was a bit more concerned about his head shape and recommended being more aggressive about his positioning when laying down or sitting to keep him off his right side. I moved his swing, bought a special Boppy Noggin Nest pillow, and used a rolled receiving blanket to position his head in his crib.
Back to present. On Wednesday we had a consultation appt at Cranial Technologies. They took several pictures from various angles of his head and face. They measured his head and did some neck stretches and diagnosed him with plagiocephaly. Definition: "a malformation of the head marked by an oblique slant to the main axis of the skull." AKA "Flat head syndrome"........Um, did someone use "syndrome" and my baby's name in the same sentence??
It's Greek to me! Plagio = oblique,cephale = head..Check out this image from http://www.cranialtech.com/ According to the site & experts, external forces put pressure on the soft plates in an infant's head, causing them to flatten out on the preferred side.
I've seen babies in helmets before. And no, for the record, I'm not an asshole who thinks the baby is clumsy, the mom drops her kid, or whatev else ignorant fools must think. Okay, I was semi-ignorant and thought the helmet was for a cosmetic issue. I understood. Nobody wants a baby conehead. I went to school with some coneheads and while we didn't tease them, we noticed Oblong Ollie and Elliptical Eddie. kidding.
Turns out plagiocephaly/flat head occurs during utero OR (as my pediatrician says) happy, big headed babies have a preference for one side. Yep, that would be my kid. 90th percentile in head size and happy as hell. The kid knows what he wants, and it's to look at the world over his right shoulder.
I'm camo-ing my feelings by being blase. It's because I want to cry at the irrational mommy thoughts "Does his flat head hurt him? Will the helmet be hot? Will people stop complimenting my gorgeous sweet angel baby? How long will he actually need to be in it? I hope Nick doesn't make it into a Nebraska helmet! Will insurance pay? Arggh!" This is a problem though... Medically having a flat side to your head means that the other side of your head is pushed out. It can result in malformation of the ear tubes, sinuses, jaw, etc. The pictures of him show that the round side of his head is stretching one eye, causing it to be more slanted than the other. (Mommy didn't cheat with the Asian milkman either!...okay, sick joke..I do that when I'm uncomfortable)
So, the clinician predicts that Cade will need to be in a band-style helmet about 8-12 weeks. DOC band, to be precise... there are several types out there. DOC is pretty well rated by parents, and FDA approved as a Class II orthotic. It's a 6 oz plastic shell lined with foam that is custom-fit to each baby. To get fitted apparently Cade gets to be pretty high-tech. There's a head stocking that stretches over his head, takes measurements, and sends it digitally to a printer that prints a 3-D "headsicle" (head on a stick) by which his orthotic will be molded. (imagine the technology Angelina used to get digitized for TombRaider). Hopefully digital Cade is just as cute as real Cade.
Right now we're waiting to see what craptastic teacher insurance will pay for. It's $3,600 for the helmet and the weekly, yes weekly, therapy appointments. (Cade will be evaluated for torticollis-- basically a tight, malformed neck muscle that makes it more comfy for babies to have their chin angled towards one shoulder) After the fitting it will take 2 more weeks for the helmet to made in fabulous Arizona, then he begins his journey towards round head mecca.
I'm hoping the journey is short & sweet & successful! I'm currently searching for cool ways to decorate the helmet. Again, we must not leave it to Daddy lest we have an Aggie baby in a Nebraska helmet. And everyone knows, red and marroon are just wrooonggg.
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Vomit, Poop, and Pee Pee -- oh my!
I can't believe today.
I knew trying to leave the house and go out with my baby was going to be a pain at times, but this was just ridiculous. I'm sure I had some crazy karma coming my way... and today I got it! As I said, we were going out to lunch at my FAVORITE burger place (Twisted Root Burger Co, you MUST get yourself there and order a Fried Ride). So I was eager to take Cade ASAP.
1st-- He had spit up all around the collar of his onesie. I figured "no biggie, a little spit up don't get in the way of me and my burger"
2nd-- As I carried Cade to his car seat he peed through one leg of his diaper and it got on the onesie. Apparently I don't know how to secure a diaper properly after 12 weeks. Awesome. I call my mom and tell her I'm running late, just doing a quick change. I put the cell phone down at the foot of the changing table. Big Mistake #1.
3rd-- I left the new diaper open as I turned for a new onesie. Big Mistake #2. (In my defense, my husband told me penises need a little "air time". I enjoy being the expert on everything, but I do know my place and surrendered penis territory to Daddy.) Cade peed a perfect little piss arc on my cell phone. Um, luckily (?), the pee landed on the screen not the buttons, so my phone works. I don't know pee phone protocol, so I wipeyed it down and then used a rubbing alcohol swipe on it. That seems clean enough. And pee is sterile, I've heard.
4th-- I tempt fate and think "It can't get any worse" so I put Cade in the pirate onesie. It's so freaking cute, it says "Argh", but for some reason he always poops/spits up/etc in it. I clean him up, put him in it, and put him the carrier and BAM! Milky vomit all over the onesie. I couldn't even read the "Argh". So I took him back to his room, cleaned him up AGAIN and we were able to go on our way.
I ate half a burger, curly fries, onion strings, and sweet potato fries (I shared the fried sides with 2 other people, btw). It was bliss followed by an ice cold Twisted Root root beer. ... . . and I deserved it!
I knew trying to leave the house and go out with my baby was going to be a pain at times, but this was just ridiculous. I'm sure I had some crazy karma coming my way... and today I got it! As I said, we were going out to lunch at my FAVORITE burger place (Twisted Root Burger Co, you MUST get yourself there and order a Fried Ride). So I was eager to take Cade ASAP.
1st-- He had spit up all around the collar of his onesie. I figured "no biggie, a little spit up don't get in the way of me and my burger"
2nd-- As I carried Cade to his car seat he peed through one leg of his diaper and it got on the onesie. Apparently I don't know how to secure a diaper properly after 12 weeks. Awesome. I call my mom and tell her I'm running late, just doing a quick change. I put the cell phone down at the foot of the changing table. Big Mistake #1.
3rd-- I left the new diaper open as I turned for a new onesie. Big Mistake #2. (In my defense, my husband told me penises need a little "air time". I enjoy being the expert on everything, but I do know my place and surrendered penis territory to Daddy.) Cade peed a perfect little piss arc on my cell phone. Um, luckily (?), the pee landed on the screen not the buttons, so my phone works. I don't know pee phone protocol, so I wipeyed it down and then used a rubbing alcohol swipe on it. That seems clean enough. And pee is sterile, I've heard.
4th-- I tempt fate and think "It can't get any worse" so I put Cade in the pirate onesie. It's so freaking cute, it says "Argh", but for some reason he always poops/spits up/etc in it. I clean him up, put him in it, and put him the carrier and BAM! Milky vomit all over the onesie. I couldn't even read the "Argh". So I took him back to his room, cleaned him up AGAIN and we were able to go on our way.
I ate half a burger, curly fries, onion strings, and sweet potato fries (I shared the fried sides with 2 other people, btw). It was bliss followed by an ice cold Twisted Root root beer. ... . . and I deserved it!
The many faces of Cade
It's so funny to see Cade's personality already... I thought we'd have even more waiting after he was born to see what he's like, but these pictures capture a lot of his looks. He can be such a flirt with me, so persistant, engaging, serious, thoughtful, you can see him processing through things which I love! He's curious, he wonders about the world about him, he loves to watch himself in the mirror, he punks me when he lets out a little yelp and then once he has my attention he gives me that shit-eating grin. He likes to start conversations with a grunt, and then he grabs onto my fingers and we talk back and forth, where I imitate his sounds and he smiles. He doesn't even take out his binky, but I don't mind. He's our little man with a little plan!
So yesterday at the mall I was parading him around in the stroller. I haven't quite found the balance of proud mom yet. If someone compliments my fabulously gorgeous baby (okay, I'm the only one who's actually called him that) I either launch into full on conversation OR I don't acknowledge at all. It's like I have some extreme flip where I'm suddenly your best friend or I'm diva mommy who can't be bothered by your papparizzi-esque flattery. Honestly, how obnoxious am I? But if I'm focused on getting my Diet Dr. Pepper refill at Chic-fil-A and trying to summon willpower not to refill my waffle fries as well, then it's really hard to also turn on mega-sweet smile and look deserving of this little doll I'm pushing around.
Also, I hate to admit my flaws, I really do, but I have to confess... I might be getting a little psycho around prego women. I want to tell them how freaking amazing their lives are going to be and yes, get the epidural, and no, maybe you won't be in labor as long as me, and yes, it's so worth it and I'd do it again even though when I was pushing I thought I might just die. Instead as I'm walking around the mall with my badass stroller and badass little baby, I give a smile that I hope is encouraging and knowing. And I keep my distance around the strangers who are prego. I know there's a chance they're jealous that I already have my baby and they haven't met their yet. Oh yes, I remember that feeling. Howev, my prego friends, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I can't keep my trap shut and my verbal diarrhea is like spoiling Christmas by telling them how miraculous and fabulous their baby will be. It's not cool, I'm aware it's annoying, and...I'm sorry.
Sunday, June 28, 2009
Swim Time!
June 28th was our first family swim day! We headed over to Lolli & Papa's house to take Cade for an evening swim. Of course, Izzy had to get in on the action. The pool is above the ground style, and Lolli had put Izzy on the outdoor table so she could see us. Sure enough the dog balanced front legs on the edge of the pool and hind legs on the table and was wagging her tail like crazy.
After some coaxing, she jumped in our arms to join us! She never ceases to amaze us at her mothering instincts, she just HAD to check on Cade (see her on Nick's back?). This was actually Cade's second time in a pool, this time was much more of a success compared to the first time. First time we were with my girlfriends and he slept through the whole experience. Most chill baby ev-er... how the heck did he end up that way?! Now that we've got more head control he enjoyed kicking his feet a bit as we whirled him around the water. Izzy found a perch on the floating lounge chair and it was good family fun. I can't wait to buy him pool toys and play games with him. It's like my childhood part 2! Only better more high-tech toys. I scoped out the selection in Target the other day. I found these little balls that you can dive for, howev-- twist!, you can set them to float at varying heights in the water, super tricky. And goggles are waaay cooler these days. They have some that look like SpiderMan eyes. And I better have a little girl next time, because there are little mermaid barbie things that swim in the pool! Anyways, the best is yet to come! I can't WAIT!
Bye Bye star jammies
Cade has outgrown his star jammies....it's a sad sad day for me. I bought them for $5 at Target for a Christmas gift for Nick. The first jammies I ever bought my baby. We would go into the nursery before he was born and hold them up and giggle at how cute it would be to see a baby in them. The first time we put Cade in the star jammies, we cried and laughed. It's just the cutest thing ever. I can't stand it. Sometimes I have to look away, that's how precious it is.
Cade's also starting to outgrow my favorite outfit, his little polo-style striped navy onesie. Dare I go buy the next size up so I can continue to see him in these cute outfits? I'm not ready to say good-bye to them, it's more than I can handle right now. If it makes me that happy, I should do it, right? Or is that psycho? The little drawer I've started of outgrown clothes is getting full, it almost makes me hyperventilate. I have to shove in the latest too-small outfit and slam it shut before I get a peek of the other clothes that have come to pass.
I might go buy the next size up of these things. As long as he doesn't go to kindergarten in the bigger version of these onesies, that's cool. Right?
Cade's also starting to outgrow my favorite outfit, his little polo-style striped navy onesie. Dare I go buy the next size up so I can continue to see him in these cute outfits? I'm not ready to say good-bye to them, it's more than I can handle right now. If it makes me that happy, I should do it, right? Or is that psycho? The little drawer I've started of outgrown clothes is getting full, it almost makes me hyperventilate. I have to shove in the latest too-small outfit and slam it shut before I get a peek of the other clothes that have come to pass.
I might go buy the next size up of these things. As long as he doesn't go to kindergarten in the bigger version of these onesies, that's cool. Right?
Friday, June 26, 2009
Baby Bumps
Here are my favorite pics. The first one is so lame, but I was still hiding my pregnancy from coworkers at that point. I love how until December I had to majorly arch my back so I could feel really round and prego. By January I didn't so much need to do that. With that much weight and the perfectly rounded basketball-looking belly I probably would have really pissed off my chiropractor had I kept up that pose constantly.
Being pregnant or having a baby? Having my baby to hold in my arms is way better. I told my mom and dad today that I wasn't surprised that I would love Cade more than I had ever imagined..what has surprised me about being a mom is how much he already adores me. He will be falling asleep and if I talk his little eyelids struggle to open and find me. I can talk him and smile him out of being sad. When I find him in the crib on mornings when he's awake and waiting for me to get him, as soon as I go in and talk to him he lights up and everything looks right in his world. Mmmmm, I've been waiting my whole life to be loved like this! It's the most heavenly, delicious feeling in the world.
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
omg--- parent lifeguards to the rescue
Thank God for baby monitors....Just had our first "Holy shit! My baby's choking and gasping for air!" moment. It all started with a little cough or two, then the unmistakable sound of choking. And the terrifying sound of little baby gasp that makes you, as their parent, want to simultaneaously throw up on yourself and burn down the world to save them.
Nick and I ran to the nursery to get Cade, which totally freaked out the dog who barked at us and ran after us. In my instant replay right now I recall that sprint feeling more like slow-mo Baywatch running, minus red slutsuit and fabulous hair. Really though, is there any speed that is fast enough when you think your child is in danger? Me thinks not.
I grabbed Cade and in an instant was so relieved that his face wasn't purple and that he was starting to sputter out spit/milk. I really hope that I didn't pause and smile at his normal pink color. I threw him up on my shoulder and got a big burp out along with a little more spit-up. He was breathing fine and was pretty calm, okay, maybe mildy upset. At least of the three of us, he won the calm award. (Nick and I being instantly disqualified for holding our breaths up until that point.) I rocked him for an unnecessarily long twelve minutes (he fell right back to sleep, after allowing me to feel like somewhat of a hero as he whimpered and I consoled).
What is wrong with me that I am patting myself on the back for getting CPR certified? (ahem, and AED should you need debfibrillating, heh heh) Why does it feel oh-so-good to be the one to soothe a whimpering baby with hugs and soft words. I'm not so sure that "Shhh, Mommy's here" would be comforting if he realized that I'm new at this gig and am pretty much making it up as I go along.
So, yes I'll head to bed now. I doubt I'll be able to sleep for fear of another choking incident. In fact, bed might very well be a pallet of blankets on the floor by his crib (laminated infant CPR cheat sheet in hand). And I'm sure fate will have it that this kid will sleep 8 hours straight. Nick and I just said earlier tonight, the world could completely go to hell, as long as our baby is healthy and safe we will be happy. I refuse to take that for granted and promise that I thank God and pray for him every night. With that, I'll sign off for the night, so you can go pray for him too.
Nick and I ran to the nursery to get Cade, which totally freaked out the dog who barked at us and ran after us. In my instant replay right now I recall that sprint feeling more like slow-mo Baywatch running, minus red slutsuit and fabulous hair. Really though, is there any speed that is fast enough when you think your child is in danger? Me thinks not.
I grabbed Cade and in an instant was so relieved that his face wasn't purple and that he was starting to sputter out spit/milk. I really hope that I didn't pause and smile at his normal pink color. I threw him up on my shoulder and got a big burp out along with a little more spit-up. He was breathing fine and was pretty calm, okay, maybe mildy upset. At least of the three of us, he won the calm award. (Nick and I being instantly disqualified for holding our breaths up until that point.) I rocked him for an unnecessarily long twelve minutes (he fell right back to sleep, after allowing me to feel like somewhat of a hero as he whimpered and I consoled).
What is wrong with me that I am patting myself on the back for getting CPR certified? (ahem, and AED should you need debfibrillating, heh heh) Why does it feel oh-so-good to be the one to soothe a whimpering baby with hugs and soft words. I'm not so sure that "Shhh, Mommy's here" would be comforting if he realized that I'm new at this gig and am pretty much making it up as I go along.
So, yes I'll head to bed now. I doubt I'll be able to sleep for fear of another choking incident. In fact, bed might very well be a pallet of blankets on the floor by his crib (laminated infant CPR cheat sheet in hand). And I'm sure fate will have it that this kid will sleep 8 hours straight. Nick and I just said earlier tonight, the world could completely go to hell, as long as our baby is healthy and safe we will be happy. I refuse to take that for granted and promise that I thank God and pray for him every night. With that, I'll sign off for the night, so you can go pray for him too.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
post-prego fashions
Man, if you asked me 3 months ago if I thought I'd have a HARDER time dressing myself at this point, I would have punched you. Turns out, post-prego fashions are NOT cute, NOT fun, and it's NOT exciting to be able to fit into old clothes. I've learned there is a difference betweeen "fitting in my old non-prego clothes" and "looking acceptable to go into public". Since baby, I've actually looked at myself in the mirror and said "Eh, that's good enough". Who the hell have I become?!! Since when did "good enough" mean an outfit was okay to wear out? In public??
It took me 3 times of wearing the pink dress/black bra combo to realize I look like utter garbage. If you have to convince yourself that your black bra that's peeking out the top of the dress looks like a cami, then you probably shouldn't wear it. [Edit..strike "peeking out" and insert "showing about 2.5 inches above top of dress"] And then you shouldn't find yourself constantly asking friends "Doesn't this look like a cami?"
Hindsight = 20/20. What must they have thought? Ummm...hello Captain Awkward! You're asking us when you're already downtown, 30 minutes from home. What the hell are you going to do if we say "No, bitch, that's CLEARLY a nursing bra?" Seriously, what the hell would you do? Remove the bra and risk milking yourself at your friend's bachelorette?" Ugh, I'm seriously horrified at my lack of judgement.
So I wore the dress out in public for the FINAL TIME (I swear) on a shopping date with my son and mother. I caught the back of myself in the mirror and realized not only does my bra show in the front (this time I thought I was "cool" b/c I looked like I was "layering"), but the f-ing bra shows in the BACK too! Ugggh! Tackola. So I put on my cardi --- my mom was SO grateful, you'd think I'd birthed another grandchild, and luckily that saved the look. I'm shocked she didn't make me buy another outfit as soon as we hit Nordstroms.
I made it home without getting kicked out of Stonebriar for being white trash (again, I tried another excuse "But Carrie Bradshaw shows HER bra!"....then I reminded myself that No, No she didn't show her NURSING bra EV-ER!). I turned to my honey for consolation that evening. My loving husband of 3 years (happy anniversary baby!) told me he wondered why I kept wearing that nightgown out anyways. *grooooan*
All that's left for me to ponder is....
-Why did he let me leave the house in what he thought was a nightgown/bra combo?
-Why do my friends still talk to me after I rocked this look at a bachelorette? A bachelorette! Oh God...I'm so so embarassed.
-Where the hell does one go to find sundresses with straps that are more "lasagna noodle" and less "spaghetti"?
Poor, poor Cade.... his mommy is already embrassing him in public. damn.
It took me 3 times of wearing the pink dress/black bra combo to realize I look like utter garbage. If you have to convince yourself that your black bra that's peeking out the top of the dress looks like a cami, then you probably shouldn't wear it. [Edit..strike "peeking out" and insert "showing about 2.5 inches above top of dress"] And then you shouldn't find yourself constantly asking friends "Doesn't this look like a cami?"
Hindsight = 20/20. What must they have thought? Ummm...hello Captain Awkward! You're asking us when you're already downtown, 30 minutes from home. What the hell are you going to do if we say "No, bitch, that's CLEARLY a nursing bra?" Seriously, what the hell would you do? Remove the bra and risk milking yourself at your friend's bachelorette?" Ugh, I'm seriously horrified at my lack of judgement.
So I wore the dress out in public for the FINAL TIME (I swear) on a shopping date with my son and mother. I caught the back of myself in the mirror and realized not only does my bra show in the front (this time I thought I was "cool" b/c I looked like I was "layering"), but the f-ing bra shows in the BACK too! Ugggh! Tackola. So I put on my cardi --- my mom was SO grateful, you'd think I'd birthed another grandchild, and luckily that saved the look. I'm shocked she didn't make me buy another outfit as soon as we hit Nordstroms.
I made it home without getting kicked out of Stonebriar for being white trash (again, I tried another excuse "But Carrie Bradshaw shows HER bra!"....then I reminded myself that No, No she didn't show her NURSING bra EV-ER!). I turned to my honey for consolation that evening. My loving husband of 3 years (happy anniversary baby!) told me he wondered why I kept wearing that nightgown out anyways. *grooooan*
All that's left for me to ponder is....
-Why did he let me leave the house in what he thought was a nightgown/bra combo?
-Why do my friends still talk to me after I rocked this look at a bachelorette? A bachelorette! Oh God...I'm so so embarassed.
-Where the hell does one go to find sundresses with straps that are more "lasagna noodle" and less "spaghetti"?
Poor, poor Cade.... his mommy is already embrassing him in public. damn.
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