The temptation to be a huge bitch while pregnant is too irrestible this week. Coworkers and boss beware, strangers in the grocery store-- watch out... it has been all I can do to reign in the urge to go CRAZY on everyone.
Urges I have successfully controlled in the past 24 hours:
1. Responding to every statement at work with "f--- off"
2. Throwing all books in my classrooom onto the floor in a fit of rage
3. Typing up a Jerry Maguire-style memo telling everyone just what is wrong with the way things work and how things should be done my way
4. Responding to every statement at work with "That's the worst idea I've ever heard"
5. Rear-ending the car in front of me because I just don't care about the red lights anymore... really. don't care.
6. Starting a never-ending bitch session, and refusing to let others bitch with me, but monopolize twenty minutes of just me straight out venting.
Bits of crazy I just can't help but unleash:
1. Helping myself to a big piece of cake with the only knife available and then throwing away the knife without asking anyone else if they want cake.
2. Pushing my grocery cart with my baby belly AND talking on the cell phone AND making other people get out of my way b/c I'm pretending to be oblivious
3. Going into someone else's supplies w/o asking to get myself knife in #1 (don't get in the way of a prego and her lunch/chocolate fix)
4. Letting out a big dramatic sigh a few times a day (without explaining why or acknowledging others' confused stares)
I'm pretty proud of not going totally psycho... I acknowledge that I'm not the most objective judge of my personal behavior. Overall, I'm exhausted, I'm HUGE, and I'm over the unneccessary drama of other people's emotions/dumb opinions. Over it! My new mission is to enjoy my last weeks of being single and selfish. Sorry work & responsibilities--- this is my final fling to enjoy the selfish life before my focus switches to my little man. Dinner with girlfriends, indulgent movies and popcorn, pedicures, and beauty treatments are my current priority.
Consider yourselves warned!