9 DOC days!

Wow, 9 weeks flies when you're in a DOC band... um, okay, when your baby is in a DOC band. There were only maybe 30 sticker-less minutes total. I never put the pirate stickers on, for some reason I thought those would be cute and match his cute little "Argh" onesie, but that's just it. There's only one pirate onesie. We rocked stars, skater/rocker, puppies, Huskers, football, baseball, and stars again!

Just finished another week back to work. The labor day weekend was so amazing. I wanted to spend every spare second with Cade. It was easier to take a break from him when I was on maternity leave, it was a must-do to take care of myself. But now, Monday thru Friday, it's hard to commit myself to anything that takes me away from him. I want to enjoy a few hours of "me time", whether it's go to the gym, store, or dinner out without him. But I desperately need to be with him right now. It's so hard! Last night I had an amazingly yummy dinner with the girls, loved every minute, wanted to stay longer, everything was great! Then as soon as I got in the car I couldn't get home fast enough. Sure enough, I walk in the door and the house is silent. I totally missed him. Dinner, bath, rocking to sleep. All the best parts, I missed.

I did committ cardinal sin. I took the sleeping baby out of his crib and held him, talked to him, rocked him for 20 minutes in the nursery. Just me, love songs with Delilah, and my baby. Heaven! But the longer I rocked and spoke to him I started to get sad. Argh, there's nothing like the guilt trips I've put myself on since going back to work. I've never felt more guilty in my life, no matter what choice I make there's not time to give 110% to everything.

Picking him up from daycare is the best part of my day. I love the women who work there, they're all amazing and so sweet. You feel like they personally like you and your baby. I wonder if it's a rule there that they have to pour on the compliments to the baby when the mommy is around. Why does hearing how cute and precious and fun Cade is make me trust them so much more? Hm... I'm like, "YES! He is! You're right, you GET him!"

Yesterday I went to pick him up and he was not in the baby room. I kind of freaked. It was a looong 30 seconds before the director of the daycare came in holding him. Uh-oh! wtf?! She said "I was just taking Cade to visit the room next door. He is so funny, he's laughing out loud, real giggles, just cracking up!" and she looked at me so amazed. I must have looked like a total zombie mom, I was just like "Uh, yeah. He does that." I was so relieved that he was fine, more than fine, but I was also relieved that he didn't do something like walk or say his first word without me. Whew, laughing I'd already witnessed first. Thank God.

Can you imagine him doing something new at daycare? Without me? Without video?! Die. I would just die. I would take that baby into lockdown and not let him leave me for days. No ones going in, noones coming out. Yep. That's the plan. No new skills when Mommy's not there.

Anyways, life is good. It's Friday. It's before 10pm and I'm going to bed. Only way today is getting better is if someone brings me fried pickles and a chocolate malt.

Shout-outs to my top 3 readers: Amy, Melissa, and Aunt Kelly! love you ladies!