Mix Tape

I'm clearly in love. You know when you're infatuated with someone when they consume your every thought, every breath you take is for them, and when you want to make them a mix tape. (No, I'm not actually talking cassettes here, but mix tape is what it is, mix CD just doesn't sound the same or give it that innocent '80s appeal). If you don't know what I'm talking about, get thee to Blockbuster and rent High Fidelity. It's Nick & I's movie. I even watched it while in labor, and it was when I discovered the greatness of Jack Black AND was at the height of my crush with John Cusak. Go see it. Great little rom com.

To quote Rob (John Cusak's character): Now, the making of a good compilation tape is a very subtle art. Many do's and don'ts. First of all you're using someone else's poetry to express how you feel. This is a delicate thing.

So when I was pregnant I started a list of songs that made me think of Cade, and after the first few months of knowing my little man and falling deeper in love, here it is. Mommy's Mix Tape for Cade.

1. Tim McGraw - It's your love - Sang this to him as his first lullaby his first night home from the hospital. Nick and I danced and cried by his crib and said "I can't believe we did it!"

2. Kenny Chesney - You Save Me - I love me some Kenny. I loved this song when were first talking about trying for a baby. It's for both my boys.

3. Darius Rucker - It Won't Be like this for long - I first heard this song on my first solo outing with Cade, driving to Target. Cried all the way there, horomonal nightmare that I was. But I have to listen to it, and I love it because I can't take one second with him for granted.

4. - Feels like home to me - Nick put this on a mix tape for me when we were dating.

5. Aerosmith - Don't wanna miss a thing - I heard this song in the car right after the dr appointment where we heard Cade's heartbeat for the first time. The part of the song "Lying close to you, Feeling your heart beating, And I'm wondering what you're dreaming, Wondering if it's me you're seeing" was playing at that moment. I felt so connected to my baby, it was an awesome moment.

6. Rascal Flatts - My Wish - I wouldn't be a good mom if I didn't identify with this song. Reminds me of my mother in law, she's such a good mom.

7. Trace Adkins - You're Gonna miss this.

8. Elton John - Blessed - Nick and I danced to this as our last song at our wedding. Back then it symbolized the next step in our lives, starting our family. Now we're making that dream come true. (God, I'm a HUGE sap. HUGE)

9. Plain White Tees - 1, 2, 3, 4 - During early morning and middle of the night feedings I would watch this on VH1, it felt meant to be. Those quiet times when it felt like only the 2 of us were awake in this world was such a bonding moment... just me and Cade, and this sweet song.

10. Steve Holy - Good Morning Beautiful - Another song I heard when Cade and I were on one of our first outings together. I was grieving for my grandmother, this song came on, and I realized that I had a beautiful boy and a beautiful reason to keep on and appreciate life. Every day waking up to him is a beautiful day.


In my mind Cade will take these songs with him on his first campout, to college, and maybe we'll dance to one of them at his wedding one day. Just so long as he knows that his mommy loves him. Lesson: You're never too old to make a mix tape.